Sad today..

I am a bit sad and with it also angry today. This is for two reasons.

A friend's loss.
I can honestly say that as a chaplain to the fire brigade I like all of my fire fighters. I have various levels of contact and relationship, and we all have our rough edges, but I cannot think of any of them I dislike. Having said that there are those you are drawn to more than others. Ben is one of those. I like him because what you see is what you get. He is just Ben, honest, not trying to be anything he is not and he is a keen runner. I feel at ease around Ben. I read in the paper today that Ben's 32 year old son died as a result of a tragic accident in London on Monday. Today I feel sad for Ben. I wish I could take away some of the pain he must be feeling. I feel sad because of his loss. There is also a bit of anger there that life is such that these tragic accidents happen.

It's only money but it seems unfair.
The second reason I feel angry is that we have a foster daughter who to all intents and purposes we treat as one of our own. (It would be easier if we had adopted her but the powers that be would not allow that) She is severely disabled, 32 years of age, in care and receives a disability allowance. We are her "property managers" and Jean carefully looks after what spending money she is allowed. She pays for clothing, bed linen, furniture, doctors visits, meds and toiletries out of this. Jean has been putting some aside into a couple of investment funds. One is to pay for her inevitable funeral, the other for maybe a special holiday for Pania some time. Our "status" as property managers has to be reviewed in court every three years. Jean's book keeping is audited in the process and Pania (who cant speak at all and can only feed herself with a spoon) has to apply to the court for it to be renewed. There has to be two lawyers involved and the legal process costs quite a lot of money. Other times this has meant that the lawyer fills out a legal aid form and applies for legal aid for the costs and previously this has been accepted. (Lawyers' charges are $210 an hour!) This time, because of my wife's careful management of Pania's money and her amassed fortune (Around $5000) we have been turned down for legal aid. Here we are doing a voluntary job looking after this poor woman's affairs, (She did not ask to be disabled) we have to seek the permission of the courts to be allowed to do the job, and she has to pay for it. Criminals I know of, who have not disclosed the where abouts of their ill gotten gains get legal aid by the thousands for appealing their sentences! I am angry about the system. Some how it seems unfair. Either way lawyers laugh all the way to the bank, they have guaranteed income sources.