This tourists inner conflict

Questions

Aramoana is a settlement near the mouth of Otago Harbour. Mention it's name around NZ and people now know it as a place of tragedy. A gunman went on a shooting rampage there and thirteen people were killed. When they explored that gunman's house they found weapons, books about weapons and killing etc. People said of this and other such sad discoveries in other cases, "The guy was unbalanced - obviously! Look at the things he had in his house!" I visited a "house" recently, a much visited house. In at least three of its rooms guns lined the walls. Swords were displayed all over the place. In another there were several trophies of war. I was visiting with an Indian friend and one of the trophies taken after some battle with an Indian ruler was a golden tiger's head. The commentary raved on how this was "taken after... such and such... a battle." I turned to my friend and said, "They stole that from you guys!" Of course the house was Windsor Castle, a place revered by the british people.... but I found myself questioning the values we revere and endorse in such a place. I have been visiting such sites in European cities over the last few weeks, and am disturbed by the things we often value. There are buildings, statues and whole sites set aside remembering triumphs in very dubious wars! "This was built to celebrate Napolean's triumph over...." the voice on the hop-on bus commentary says. But in my inner being I am asking, ...Hey.... should he have been fighting them in the first place? Probably "No!"...Secondly it wasn't "Napolean's" triumph.... it was his soldiers'... probably a bunch of poor guys fed as cannon fodder into battle to please some unbalanced twisted priorities of their imperial leader! ... And should we be remembering and reinforcing such things, holding them up as fine examples of what it means to be a hero in our cultures? Are these worth heralding in our global world?

Again we have been looking at opulence, ostentation and examples of how people showed others that they were "rich and powerful". More than one commentary has said that these things were built, or collections gathered to show other nations, or world leaders or visiting dignitaries just how powerful they were. In simple terms so many of these things were done or built or gathered to "show off"! My guess is that when they were done there were countless beggars at the gate struggling for daily bread. (They are still there today) I value the works of art etc. but I find myself conflicted by the values that brought them about and the values we express by revering them so much. On one hand in the school playground we tell children off for "showing off", but in other ways through our media, tourism and the lifestyle we promote we encourage it, and hold it up as almost the very purpose of life.

Then I have visited Churches. In the famous churches the two dubious values mentioned above are repeated. Ostentation ("This church was built by...") and militarism seem to be given the "big guy's" green light, - even divine recognition by being represented in a culturally moulded religion. While recognising the history and the art, in my inner-being I find myself disturbed and questioning. I find the words of Jesus challenging the things and people revered. "Those that live by the sword will die by the sword!" ... "Love your enemies"... "Give to the poor". Also the Apostle Paul's words, "Do not let the world about you mould you according to it's pattern. But let God transform you..." (Romans 12)

The good life?

Here I am swanning around on an extended holiday being a tourist. Visiting sites like the Eiffel tower, St Paul's, London Bridge, Big Ben, The Louvre, Windsor Castle etc. etc. I am eating often in restaurants. People have said to me, "You lucky thing!" I know also that many of the people I mix with will never get to do such a thing. If I tell stories of my journey they will sit there getting quite jealous. (I also know that my life savings will take a big hit!) I guess such overseas experiences are things we covet. We often save, plan and look forward to them...... Now I am learning heaps. I am enjoying myself. I am trying to make the best of this opportunity. But there is a real sense in which I could say, "I'd rather be at home." I had my friend Laurie Findlay die and I hated being over here. A man in one of my chaplaincies had his wife die in the last few days. I had been talking to him when she was terminally ill and he had told me that I would take her funeral. I hate being over here! I would rather be there able to give support. I see beggars in the street here. I cannot do anything about them! At home I can try. I went to St Pauls and sat there frustrated because to my mind here was an opportunity to present to "the world" a "real" religion and it was, in my opinion, squandered. (Perhaps a theme for another post) At home I can do something about presenting a real religion. So, for me, being on holiday, being a tourist is good, O.K.... but living a useful life at home has more "bang for your bucks", more "kicks", more significance. My big OE is good, but not a major highlight in my life.

This was driven home to me yesterday.... We were on the internet trying to plan what we will see and do in the days in the UK after we leave London on Thursday. (I know it's a bit late!) While doing this I received news via "facebook" of the death of the chaplaincy guy's wife. I was so distraught I said, "Here we are trying to work out how we are going to fill our time up, when there's stuff I could and should be doing at home! I HATE it here!" Our tourism seemed so insignificant compared to what I could be doing at home.

Now what am I going to do today... explore Soho, see if we can get on "the eye", maybe visit Westminster Cathedral, and end the day with an evening at the Royal Albert, and take a London cab ride home .... What a mixed up boy I am!

Video: The bells of St Pauls. (turn yourr sound on)